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...don't want jokes that chatgpt can do. ========================================== More info: We focus on jokes such as "would you rather" for quite sharp middle school students. We've already used all the capabilities chatgpt has to offer. Now we're looking for high quality jokes written by real humour professionals. Example of a typical joke generated with chatgpt : Would you rather share a huge birthday cake with a dragon or a giant milkshake with a unicorn? Example with a human writer: Would you rather have a long, sticky tongue to grab your friends' sweets or teeth that keep growing back so you can eat lots of sweets? We refuse all jokes that are racist, discriminating, sexual, violent, political or religious, vulgar, brutal, about drugs, ...
I'm looking for a skilled Web Developer or Designer to overhaul my current website's layout and typography. The typography seems inconsistent across the webpages and desperately needs a professional touch for uniformity. Key Tasks: - Refactor CSS in-line with the typography and layout adjustments to maintain site performance and User Interface. - Sculpt the website layout for bet...performance and User Interface. - Sculpt the website layout for better content organization to enrich user experience and engagement. Desired Experience: The ideal candidate should be proficient in CSS, have a keen eye for typography and layout consistency, as well as a good understanding of content organization in web design. Familiarity in enhancing web layout for a richer user experience would be...
I'm in need of a professional and visually appealing banner for my website. The banner should be a balanced mix of text and images, adhering to a specific color scheme. Please upload the finalized design incorporating our logo for website consideration; any mock-up submissions will be automatically disregarded. You will find the necessary information attached for creating the banner, which focuses on the KTT Telex services offered by the bank. All details about this service are included in the attached file. **Key Requirements:** - Design a website banner with a mix of text and images - Use the specific color scheme as the banner currently showcased on the website: https://prominencebank.com. - Banner Size: 1903x560 cm **Ideal Skill...
...com/customer-reviews/ The new pages can use the hero banner from this page on every page: At the moment, we are not worried about improving the content; we only want it transferred in an organized fashion. Standardize the typesetting, standardize the hero banner, and make sure the images are clear and that the content is responsive on mobile. Don't change the content. Just clean it up and present it as professionally as possible. The site is using WooCommerce; however, for this initial project, it is irrelevant since none of the
I own a beautiful property (house + land) in a fabulous location (North West Ireland), and I'd like to raffle it on Raffall - an online platform. The raffle campaign would possibly be for a 3-4 month duration, but I have yet to start. I have loads of ideas and I've done loads of research into it. I am very confident it would be a huge success. Your role will be crucial in managing the campaign from the ground up. Tasks: - Kickstart the project from scratch, as it has yet to begin - Set the strategic direction for advertising and promotion, employing out-of-the-box methodologies to generate attention and spark engagement The ideal candidate: - BASED IN IRELAND - Proven experience in executing successful raffle campaigns, particularly focusing on the advertising a...
I'm in search of an Excel expert who can assist me with complex tasks in Excel. Specifically, help is needed in two key areas: - Formulas & Functions: While basic arithmetic operations are simple for me, I need assistance with text and date functions. - VBA Macros: I'm looking for someone who can de...need assistance with text and date functions. - VBA Macros: I'm looking for someone who can develop advanced user forms and interfaces. This requires a high level of VBA expertise. The ideal candidate would have a strong background in Excel, with a focus on formulas, functions, and VBA. Previous experience working on advanced macros and a deep understanding of text and date functions will be a huge plus. The ability to communicate effectively and understand my...
Hi. I am looking for a talented and creative designer to create an eye-catching design for an Exhibition Booth Backdrop, and one Roll Up Banner (total 2 items) for our Aircraft Cleaning Company. Delivery is Urgent within 48 Hours (by May 21, 2024). Project description and pictures are attached. Thank you.
I'm in need of a skilled and experienced freelancer to create a WordPress website for my jewelry brand. Key Requirements: - E-commerce Functionality: I want the website to have a smooth and secure checkout process, with the ability to add products, categorize them, and...need assistance with the copywriting for the website. This includes product descriptions, brand story, and any other textual content needed for the site. Ideal Skills and Experience: - Proven experience in developing WordPress websites with e-commerce functionality - A strong portfolio of responsive design projects - Copywriting experience, especially in the fashion/jewelry industry, will be a huge plus Please share your relevant portfolio and experience in your proposal. I'm excited to find a great mat...
I need a professional who can help me with scraping data API from a specific website or platform. I'm looking to extract specific data points or information and potentially set up a regular scraping process. Key Requirements: - Proficiency in Web Scraping: I need someone who has experience with web scraping tools and techniques. - Data Mining Skills: The ability to identify and extr...or information and potentially set up a regular scraping process. Key Requirements: - Proficiency in Web Scraping: I need someone who has experience with web scraping tools and techniques. - Data Mining Skills: The ability to identify and extract the specific data points I require is crucial. - Automation Expertise: If you have experience setting up automated scraping processes, that would be a huge...
I'm seeking a talented data scientist specializing in ship engine assembly to analyze key parameters and offer process insights. Key Parameters and Metrics: - **Efficiency:** Analyze the efficiency of our ship engine assembly processes. - **Performance:** Look into the performance metrics of the assembly line. - **Reliability**: Assess the re...choose the models for llms and RAG and frameworks Ideal Skills: - Proven experience in data science, particularly in the manufacturing industry with a focus on ship engine assembly. - Proficient in analyzing and interpreting efficiency, performance, and reliability metrics. - Excellent at providing actionable insights for process optimization. - Understanding of ship engine assembly workflow is a huge plus. - We will be using public ...
I need a professional to design engaging, interactive banners for my website. Your task will mostly involve creating designs that will interact with our users and keep them engaged. These banners should be eye-catching, creative, and fit within our brand's overall aesthetic. Ideal Skills: - Experience designing interactive banners. - A deep understanding of user engagement. - Proficiency with design software and tools. - Knowledge of digital marketing strategies. - Strong sense of creativity and attention to detail. Your contribution will play a significant role in keeping our users engaged, hence improving our website's overall user experience. If you have previous work samples of similar projects, it would be a great addition to evaluate your suitability for this job.
I am seeking a dedicated individual who is skilled in appointment setting and has a flair for sales. Your target will primarily be small businesses, with tasks centered around scheduling appointments for my emerging web design agency. Key Responsibilities: - You will be achieving this via phone calls primarily. - Familiarity with small business needs and schedule constraints is a huge plus. Qualifications: - For a successful bid, you should possess previous experience in appointment setting. - Experience in sales will be highly beneficial. Remember, this is a commission-based role, so the potential for a high earnings is there for someone proactive and positive. Let's set some appointments together and make a real difference for small businesses.
...of a talented logo designer who can add a "Hiring!" Banner to our Company Logo A in an engaging and creative way. The banner should be bright and eye-catching, catering to social media platforms where we'll primarily use it. Key aspects of the project: - Incorporating the "Hiring!" Banner: This should be seamlessly integrated into the existing logo, creating a cohesive and visually appealing design. - Bright and Eye-Catching Style: The banner should be designed in a way that it stands out effectively and catches the attention of viewers. - Social Media Adaptability: The final design should be optimized for usage on various social media platforms, ensuring it remains impactful across different channels. Ideal S...
I am in need of a professional designer to create a high-quality pull-up banner. - Dimensions: 841mm x 2000mm - Content: - Company Logo and Name - Product Images and Descriptions - Contact Information and Website URL I am looking for someone with experience in creating visually appealing and informative banners. A strong understanding of branding and design aesthetics is esse
I require a logo for a dental practice called "The Dental Retreat" located in Texas, USA. Through this logo, I'm aiming to project a calm, warm, and welcoming environment. Nature is a huge source of inspiration for me, especially trees and the earth tones of natural wood. Consequently, a logo steeped in these elements would be ideal. Though the client didn't specify colors, elements, and style, the vision for this project leaves room for creativity. However, here's a guide to help you: - Colors: Given the practice's affinity for nature, adopting colors like green, brown, and blue would be beneficial. - Elements: Trees would be great nature-inspired elements to include in the logo design. - Style: There's an emphasis on...
I'm seeking an experienced graphic designer who can create a stand-up banner and table cloth designs based on an existing PSD template. The project involves: - Designing a large stand-up banner and table cloth (8ft x 4ft) - Adhering to the provided PSD template style The final deliverables should be: - High-quality and print-ready designs - Utilizing the existing template while introducing new and creative elements - Designs should be suitable for a large format and visual from a distance As I'm not familiar with the printing terminology, I'll need you to ensure the design includes what is needed for a professional print job. Ideal skills and experience for this job include: - Proficiency in Adobe Photoshop/Illustrator - Experience in large format print d...
I'm in need of a talented graphic designer to create a cohesive and professional A3-size tri-fold brochure and a standard 85x200 roll-up banner for my business. I need the final version by maximum Monday night. The main purpose of this marketing material is to provide general information about our business to the general public. Key requirements include: - A3 Tri-Fold Brochure: This brochure should be designed to be engaging and informative. It will serve as a snapshot of our business, highlighting our key services and values in a creative and visually appealing manner. - Roll-Up Banner: The roll-up banner should be designed to be eye-catching and informative. It will be displayed in various settings to attract attention and provide an overview of our business f...
I have a guitar cover video that needs audio enhancement and autotuning. The project involves: - Autotuning the audio to ensure the pitch is accurate and in tune - Enhancing the overall sound quality to make it more professional and engaging - Clearing any background noise that might be present in the recording I'm looking for an experienced audio editor who can work with a 1-3...Autotuning the audio to ensure the pitch is accurate and in tune - Enhancing the overall sound quality to make it more professional and engaging - Clearing any background noise that might be present in the recording I'm looking for an experienced audio editor who can work with a 1-3 minute video,Good communication skills and experience with music editing tools like Audacity, Pro Tools or Logic Pro are...
Looking for a professional who can help me in creating and managing a YouTube channel. Key Responsibilities: - Creation of YouTube Channel: Setting up the channel, including profile information, banner, and other essential elements. - Video Strategy: Develop a strategy for content creation and publishing schedule to optimize channel growth. - Video Production: Assist in producing quality videos that cater to the theme of the channel. - Channel Monetization: Implement strategies to help the channel generate revenue. Ideal Skills and Experience: - Proficient in YouTube Channel Management and Optimization. - Experience in video production and editing. - Understanding of YouTube's monetization policies and strategies. - Creative mindset to help in the development of engaging vid...
Banner Redesign See attached original design 1. use all the same wording - change the imagery 2. use the attached logo
I have a completed children's book cover artwork and I need someone with experience in book cover formatting to convert it for IngramSpark's requirements. The specifics of the task are as follows: - Format size: The overall dimensions of the cover should be 8.5x11 inches. - File format: The final output should be in JPEG format. - Content: No additional text is needed on the book cov...name. - Color: The color scheme of the cover art is already determined. Your role will be in ensuring the cover meets IngramSpark's specific formatting guidelines, not in changing the color scheme. The ideal freelancer for this project would have previous experience in graphic design, particularly in book cover formatting. Understanding and familiarity with IngramSpark's requirements...
...Character B: Age 7, Dread locks, dark-skinned, in the center of the cover Character C: Age 10, Braids, light skinned, on the left of the cover I've attached a photo of the characters and want to see if you can replicate the illustration style, hair styles, and skin complexions. LITTLE BROWN BOY BOOK COVER: The cover should have Characters A, B, and C on it. They should all be facing forward, with huge smiles. Place Character C in the center, Character A to the right, and Character B to the left. The title “Little Brown Boy” should be at the top in a fun playful white font. The sub-title should be just underneath the title in black font with a white outline. The background should be a rich, VIBRANT, royal blue color exactly like it is in the cover photo of th...
...informative videos showcasing the product's value and features. - Social Proof: It's important to include testimonials from early users. You'll need to collect and edit these into compelling content that highlights how my product is making a difference in people's lives. Ideal Skills and Experience: - Previous experience managing successful crowdfunding campaigns, particularly for tech products, is a huge plus. - Strong writing skills and the ability to craft engaging, persuasive content. - Video editing and production skills, with the ability to create high-quality, engaging product demonstration videos. - Understanding of the tech enthusiast market and how to tailor a campaign to this audience. This project is time-sensitive, so I'm looking for some...
I'm looking for a skilled animator who can create a vertical 'Like, Subscribe, Share' banner to be placed on the side of my videos. - The banner should be in a 2D animation format. - It should only appear at specific times - beginning only. Like, subscribe, share Every click appreciated Ideal Skills: - Proficiency in 2D animation - Experience in creating custom video banners - Ability to work with MP4 format
I urgently need a skilled Wordpress developer to help me with a few key aspects of my site. - Theme Customization: I have a theme in place but need it tweaked to fit my needs better. I need someone who can customize it without breaking the overall design and functionality. - Plugin Development: I also need some plugins configured and set up for my Wordpress site. The plugins are 3rd pa...and set up for my Wordpress site. The plugins are 3rd party ad need to be confugured. - Ongoing support and troubleshooting I need someone who can start immediately and has great experience in general web page troubleshooting and maintenance, theme customization, plugin development and performance optimization for Wordpress. Your understanding of clean coding practices and SEO optimization is a huge...
Diseño de banner web para cyber day se necesita la mayor creatividad y sobriedad en el trabajo
I'm in need of a talented designer who can create attractive and engaging thumbnail designs for my content aimed at increasing views. The thumbnails should include: - Product images - Text - Logo/symbols The main goal for these designs is to optimize the click-through rate and boost overall views on the content. Ideal Skills: - Graphic Design - Marketing - Click-through rate optimization - Creative Thinking Experience in designing thumbnails for social media or online content would be a huge advantage. I'm looking for someone who understands the psychology behind an effective thumbnail and can translate it into eye-catching designs.
I'm in need of a talented designer to create a striking vertical banner. This banner will be dedicated to a historical moment, and is intended to convey a strong message of social justice and equality. i attached a picture with Marthin Luther King, that one would be the example of exactly what i would want it to look like. -Instead of the American flag as background i would like it to be the Curacao flag. -Instead of the Marthin Luther King jr face it would have to be the other picture i attached. (the picture can also be cropped to fit better) Key Requirements: For it to be Adobe Illustrator file so i can edit(texts etc) later on Ideal Skills: - Graphic design - Banner design - Historical context understanding - Message-driven design
Hello I want to Hire Graphic Designer on full time Monthly basis And it is not for 1 month i want to continue with long term Work is like Social Media Post logo Design Web page Design UI/UX Design Banner and flyer Design My budget is Around 15k to 25k INR monthly Exp - 2 to 3 year Timing is flexible Only Freelancer Bid this project Agency or company who provide Resource Dont bid this project
I need a Cloudflare expert to set up and configure my server for a high traffic website. - Tasks: The primary task will be setting up and configuring the server for the website. This includes but is not limited to ensuring the server is set up correctly, testing its...optimizing servers for high traffic websites is a must. - Cloudflare Specifics: While the primary focus is on server setup, knowledge of Cloudflare and its CDN (Content Delivery Network) feature is highly desired. Ideal Freelancer: A Cloudflare expert with experience in server setup and optimization, particularly for high traffic websites. Knowledge of setting up and configuring CDNs would be a huge plus. Please only apply if you have previous experience working with Cloudflare and server setup for high traffic...
I need a designer to create a graduation banner. The background should be rose gold, with three of the four photos provided. I'll attach the pictures. In terms of text, I would like some phrases in an elegant font. Key Requirements: - Create an 8x8 (64inx64in) banner - Use rose gold as the background color - Incorporate three photos that I will provide - Apply an elegant font for the text This project requires someone who can deliver a visually appealing and stylish banner while accurately reflecting the celebratory nature of a graduation.
As a growing online business, I need a freelancer to assist with the revamp of my Magento-based ecommerce website. The project will encompass: - Website Design: Your eye for design will help ensure a captivating and user-friendly website experience for our online shoppers. - Product Uploading: We have approximately 100 - 500 products to be uploaded. Efficiency and attention to detail a...approximately 100 - 500 products to be uploaded. Efficiency and attention to detail are key. - Payment Gateway Integration: Ability to integrate PayPal as a payment gateway is essential. Ideally, you should bring strong Magento experience, familiarity with PayPal integration, and a proven track record in designing user-friendly ecommerce websites. Your knack for a clean, appealing aesthetic is a huge...
I need a freelancer who can craft well-researched articles blending history with travel, focusing specifically on creating biographies of historical figures related to th...historical figures. - Illustrating: Create relevant and eye-catching illustrations that compliment the articles. - Amazon Expertise: Able to post content following Amazon's requirements on formatting and guidelines. Ideal candidate: - Background in history and travel writing. - Experience in creating biographies. - Proficient with illustration software. - Prior experience posting content on Amazon is a huge plus. - High attention to detail and ability to meet deadlines. If you're a writer-illustrator with a passion for history and travel, and you're familiar with Amazon's posting requiremen...
...interactive and user-friendly platforms. - Experience with integrating and utilizing advanced technologies such as Chat GPT, Zapier, Open AI, and Machine Learning. - Knowledge of Microsoft ecosystem and the ability to develop applications compatible with Microsoft Apps, SharePoint, and OneDrive. - Prior experience in developing business automation tools and report generation systems will be a huge plus. - Strong understanding of user experience and the ability to create an intuitive and engaging interface. Overall, I am looking for a highly skilled and innovative professional who can take my vision and turn it into a functional and efficient web-application. The successful candidate will need to have a strong technical background, as well as the creativity and problem-so...
I'm in need of a Shopify expert who can assist me in customizing a theme. The task is expected to take no more than an hour. Key tasks include: - Theme Customization: Specifically, I require layout changes to the theme. This alteration is ess...require layout changes to the theme. This alteration is essential for the improvement of the online shop. - Online Work: The project will be carried out through , so you need to be comfortable working in that environment. Your Prior Experience: - A solid understanding of Shopify and its theme structuring is crucial. - Previous experience in theme customization will be a huge advantage. Please be ready to demonstrate your skills in this area. This job is fixed-price and the task is expected to be completed within an hour.
...understanding or interest in these areas will be beneficial. The ideal candidate should be able to generate quality scripts on a weekly basis. - Marketing Expert: I am seeking a marketing professional who can strategize, execute and optimize plans to increase the channel's visibility and drive engagement. Experience in YouTube channel marketing and a strong understanding of the YouTube algorithm will be a huge advantage. - Thumbnail Makers: A skilled graphic designer with experience in creating eye-catching thumbnails that can grab the attention of potential viewers and drive clicks. Creativity, an understanding of visual design principles and the ability to visually communicate the essence of the video in a single image are key. If you have the necessary skills, experien...
I'm in need of a talented graphic designer to create 2 promotional banners for an upcoming launch event. The banners must be designed in a bright and colorful style. Key Requirements: - Create 2 promotional banners - Design must be bright and colorful Please include detailed project proposals in your application. I'm looking forward to seeing your creative ideas and past work in this area.
Seeking a true SEO/ GBP expert. A marketer with savvy insight on how American consumers thinks and act. You need to be super responsive, detail oriented, and work (typically 3-4 P.M.) EST. Your English must be excellent. If you just graduated, or if you just got hired hoping to wing it, or it takes you 3-hours to respond to a text with the owner... this position is NOT for you. It wil...computers by the day, it's plus 85% hand-held devices. You will be given recourses and other team members to work with, but you will be in charge of what needs to be done, how and when. You will be compensated monthly/ hourly. You will also get bonuses for certain milestones. The owner is also willing to invest in you, help you build your own company if you give us two years of success, that's a ...
...each have small backpacks and would be standing on a small path in front of a rock face. There is no specific requirement regarding the interaction between the characters. Other scenes depict their young mothers being handed an old ribbon bound file. The four children setting up tents with the rundown Manor House partially in view behind dense bushes. The four children struggling to push open the huge church style oak doors to the rundown manor, a small pirate style chest hidden in a basement recess. Because the illustrations are to be small, partial background to set the scene and add flavour will be acceptable. First draft Manuscript is 25% written and will be available to act as a brief. full pre edit manuscript is expected to be completed by early-mid June Desired Skills a...
...Design 5 high-quality, graphic-rich banners for Facebook carousel ads. Ensure all designs are visually appealing and aligned with our brand identity. Deliver each banner tailored to the specifications of Facebook ad requirements. Requirements: Proven graphic design experience with a strong portfolio showcasing your abilities in creating high-quality digital advertisements. Expertise in graphic design tools such as Adobe Photoshop, Illustrator, or Canva. Ability to work quickly without sacrificing quality, as this is an ongoing project with potential for more work on our Instagram accounts. Budget: $5 for 5 banners ($1 per banner). What We Offer: Immediate start for a quick turnaround project. Opportunity for ongoing work, including similar tasks for Instagram. Exposu...
I'm in need of a skilled programmer to create an automation code page for me. This code page will be focused on text processing, so a strong understanding of working with textual data is essential. Key Requirements: - Proficient in Java...JavaScript: The automation code should be written in JavaScript to ensure compatibility with other platforms. - Automation Experience: The primary function of this code will be automating tasks. A proven track record in building automated processes is highly desirable. - Text Processing: The code must be able to accurately and efficiently process textual data. Experience in this field will be a huge advantage. If you have experience in JavaScript, a background in automation, and a strong familiarity with text processing, I'd be delight...
I'm looking for a small change on the attached advertising banner ae. I need someone to simply update the text from "2015" to "2024".
I'm in need of someone who is experienced in graphic design to convert and edit a series of JPEG logos into a vector format. Here's an overview of what I need: **Conversion to Vector Format**: ...Format**: I need the logos to be transferred into a vector format without any background. This is important for their use in digital media, so it's crucial that the final output is of high quality and resolution. **Grayscale Edits**: The vectorized logos should be in grayscale, mirroring the specific range of the bottom banner. This means the freelancer will need to match the grayscale of the bottom banner, ensuring a consistent look across all logos. REFERENCE: SAME BOTTOM BANNER AS Have attached the logos along with this posting
I'm in need of a Drug Safety Associate to help me with monitoring and analyzing drug safety data. The ideal candidate should be well-versed with Aris Global LifeSphere Safety and have experience in case processing, particularly focusing on Phase III and IV of clinical trial data. Key Responsibilities: - Monitor and analyze drug safety data in Aris Global LifeSphere Safety - Process end t...focus on Phase III and IV clinical trial data Ideal Skills & Experience: - Proficiency in Aris Global LifeSphere Safety database - Previous experience with end to end case processing - Excellent understanding of Phase III and IV clinical trial data - Strong analytical skills to monitor and analyze drug safety data efficiently - Previous experience as a Drug Safety Associate or similar role is...
